I left social media last July. It started as an experiment to see if I could do it for a month and then three months and then I found I had little interest in going back. I agree with everything you say but the thing that surprises me the most is that I want to buy things less. The thing is I didn’t think I was the sort of person that was influenced by advertising but I now realise how those sponsored posts were getting to me and making me spend too much or lust over things I couldn’t afford. Now I just don’t see them and it’s amazing how quickly that feeling goes.
“The thing is I didn’t think I was the sort of person that was influenced by advertising but I now realise how those sponsored posts were getting to me and making me spend too much or lust over things I couldn’t afford”. Resonate with this so much Amanda! I wish I could say that I was immune to the siren call of influencing but I have items in my home that prove otherwise 🙈 But I’ve gotten better about it all and trust that if I didn’t know that a particular item existed before seeing someone’s post about it, then I probably don’t need it! 😊
Oh my goodness, this has really made me stop and think about all those times I have suddenly been seized by the need to buy something. I'm probably way more susceptible than I thought. Definitely time to review my social media relationship I think.
I have to find a fine balance, I find social media is a great platform for selling my art, and thus making a living. However, I don't have to be obsessed by it. I kind of envy your ability to leave totally. Way to go for leading the way.
Hello Molly, thank you for being so real. I could totally relate again! 😁. People around me always question the reason I am not in any WhatsApp groups, or why I don't receive phone calls immediately. Just unnecessary noise which I don't need, my peace matters to me. You know, I just recently understood that I get overwhelmed easily, an hsp, an introvert. I love my home which is my safety net. I now do not go out of my way to make someone else comfortable and myself uncomfortable. Coming home to myself❤️
I stopped positing on FB in July of 2021, and my life is better for it. I never got into Instagram, Twitter, or Tik Toc. I write more and that’s a good thing.
This made me delete all social media off my phone yesterday after I read it. Today I went on a morning hike with my dog, I pet my cat for thirty minutes in silence, and now I’m sitting in my car looking at sunlight listening to the spring birds sing. It’s helped me slow down a lot.
This is such a good article, Molly. You have made a lot of us think twice about how we use social media. I envy your ability to walk away from it. In my case, I use social media to stay in touch with family and friends across the world as I live a long way from where I was born and raised. I am therefore reluctant to delete it entirely. I do however struggle with various family members sharing so much of their children’s lives on social media. It feels like an invasion of the child’s privacy, especially when settings are not private. I sometimes long for the days of the landline being the only form of communication. Most days I feel like a slave to my phone!
Hello Molly, I don't have social media by choice. Never had Instagram or tiktok. It is true that you are not constantly bombed with everything, if I am interested in something I go and search on the internet but it doesn't overwhelm me or lead me to think that I am missing out on something. I live the life I want to live and I am happy with that! 🌈 I read a lot of books too because I use my time for that or stay out with my son and my partner or family. The world needs more real life and genuine relationships 💞
I dislike social media platforms and removed them from my phone. The only online platform I'm building is LinkedIn and it's stressfull enough. I take weekends off.
I wish one day, I was brave enough to quit them all. :)
Thank you for being so honest Molly! It's so refreshing to see people's accounts of what their life is like outside of social media – I think for so many of us it feels like a difficult step to take. I've massively reduced my social media over the past few years and I hope that, soon, I will be off it entirely 😊 I hope more people follow suit!
I use Youtube and Substack and very limited use of Instagram and WhatsApp (to send occasional photos).
Two friends recently said of me (independently) that I only text them to arrange a meet-up and I never message in between. I was startled by this - is this what people do? Apparently lots of people message loads between meeting up with friends. I was floored by this as it never occurred to me to do so 😆 I clearly had never seen the point!
These two friends both said that it was actually really nice because when they see me there's lots to talk about and catch-up on and one even said it makes her feel like her life is interesting because she has lots to say.
My parents also don't have the Internet in their house, my Dad keeps his MOBILE phone in a cupboard and checks it a few times a week and my OH has no social media accounts whatsoever. I think I have it easier in terms of not using it much because of these things. I'm also 44 and lived half my life without even using the Internet let alone a smart phone.
I understand that limited or no use is not for everyone as there are people in situations where social media is an absolute lifeline and it wouldn't be appropriate for them to stop using it, or even to limit their use, BUT this isn't my situation, nor that of anyone in my immediate circle, so I'll probably just carry on as I am...!
Thanks so much for this post, it's one to save and re-read.
Thanks for sharing - these points are definately food for thought. I only really look at instagram - and that's for interiors/floral ideas - but being honest have definately also been influenced to spend more because of the ads and promotions that come up. I like your idea of only tackling msgs between set times. I think I'll apply that to my instagram checking! In complete agreement re tik tok/shorts etc being grating. Unbelievably - to me a least - I was in the waiting room last week for a hospital appt and the guy two chairs away started playing a tik tok video, on loud. I get sensory overloaded by that kind of noise and after feeling like someone was grating my brain for 5 minutes I thought "no, it's not ok. I'm going to politely say something" and I did. I explained that I have problems with my ears and that's part of why I was at the hospital so would he mind using earphones? He took it ok (could have been touch and go!) but also a little like a nine year old being put in line :)) Maybe that explains why it happened too... I normally wouldn't be so bold, but I just felt so strongly about the thoughtlessness. I've seen people do this in restaurants too - flood the room with their video noise. I'm hoping that feedback/requests to turn loud videos off in public will help a few other souls with their sanity too. It could be wishful thinking!
Oh wow, this sang to my heart so much. I am so happy for you, for how you have been feeling since you left social media.
As one of the comments on here says, 'this is the most convincing leave social media piece I have read'. It was the push I needed to delete the IG app from my phone (for the rest of March, to start with, and then let's see where it goes...).
I noticed myself recently drifting away from some of my core principles (mostly a more minimal, more sustainable way of living), and I am sure that social media and pressure from the outside world had something to do with this. It's strange, because often these things can also help me to stay true to my values - but not at the moment.
Wishing you all the best from my newly (mostly!) social media free world :)
Amen to this Molly :) I left social media about 7 years ago. I also took the independent publishing house I run off all social media at the same time and lots of people told me it was business suicide. It absolutely wasn't -- it's our 20th anniversary next year and the books sing their way into the world without vaccuus 'likes' that don't translate into anything 'social' or connected in real life. Your post is beautiful and it is heart-breaking for all those who feel they 'have to' be on platforms that just eat them up.
“I don’t know what an old colleague had for breakfast.”
This sounds like such a small thing, but it’s so huge to me. Mostly because it doesn’t stop with that one person- now I know what 10 people had to breakfast, 3 brunch photos, a dozen people at lunch… and this is just FOOD!
Then it’s everyone’s 500 word opinion piece of airline safety or the royal family, or…
Just too much. I don’t need all that input. Deleted my Twitter last summer. Deleted IG earlier this year. Only have FB for client work. Haven’t deleted LinkedIn yet, but soon.
I find myself very often thinking how great will feel not having social media. I also find myself in the reality of leaving abroad and social media helps me have a glimpse of friends and family at home, or how important social media become to search for jobs, events, conferences, etc.
I don't know if I am ready to give up completely but I really consider the option to reduce my use to the minimum.
One of the things I enjoy the most now that I making an Instagram fasting is to consously enjoy places and situations that in a different time I would have been with the phone in my hand.
I loved reading your experience. Definitely something I want for myself at some point.
this is the most convincing 'leave social media' piece i have read.
gosh it's a thing i need to do,
Wow, thank you Kate!
The sooner the better, Kate! At first it might feel awkward - that’s what I’ve been told by some people - but very soon it pays off. You got this:)
Just do it, like me 2 month ago !
I left social media last July. It started as an experiment to see if I could do it for a month and then three months and then I found I had little interest in going back. I agree with everything you say but the thing that surprises me the most is that I want to buy things less. The thing is I didn’t think I was the sort of person that was influenced by advertising but I now realise how those sponsored posts were getting to me and making me spend too much or lust over things I couldn’t afford. Now I just don’t see them and it’s amazing how quickly that feeling goes.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience Amanda! Its so interesting to see how we feel over time :)
“The thing is I didn’t think I was the sort of person that was influenced by advertising but I now realise how those sponsored posts were getting to me and making me spend too much or lust over things I couldn’t afford”. Resonate with this so much Amanda! I wish I could say that I was immune to the siren call of influencing but I have items in my home that prove otherwise 🙈 But I’ve gotten better about it all and trust that if I didn’t know that a particular item existed before seeing someone’s post about it, then I probably don’t need it! 😊
Oh my goodness, this has really made me stop and think about all those times I have suddenly been seized by the need to buy something. I'm probably way more susceptible than I thought. Definitely time to review my social media relationship I think.
I have to find a fine balance, I find social media is a great platform for selling my art, and thus making a living. However, I don't have to be obsessed by it. I kind of envy your ability to leave totally. Way to go for leading the way.
Thank you for sharing Lydia! :)
Hello Molly, thank you for being so real. I could totally relate again! 😁. People around me always question the reason I am not in any WhatsApp groups, or why I don't receive phone calls immediately. Just unnecessary noise which I don't need, my peace matters to me. You know, I just recently understood that I get overwhelmed easily, an hsp, an introvert. I love my home which is my safety net. I now do not go out of my way to make someone else comfortable and myself uncomfortable. Coming home to myself❤️
Thank you so much for sharing your experience Savita! :)
I stopped positing on FB in July of 2021, and my life is better for it. I never got into Instagram, Twitter, or Tik Toc. I write more and that’s a good thing.
That's wonderful to hear, thank you for sharing Michelle :)
This made me delete all social media off my phone yesterday after I read it. Today I went on a morning hike with my dog, I pet my cat for thirty minutes in silence, and now I’m sitting in my car looking at sunlight listening to the spring birds sing. It’s helped me slow down a lot.
That's amazing! Thank you for sharing :)
It’s been two and a half months and this impulse decision changed my life
This is such a good article, Molly. You have made a lot of us think twice about how we use social media. I envy your ability to walk away from it. In my case, I use social media to stay in touch with family and friends across the world as I live a long way from where I was born and raised. I am therefore reluctant to delete it entirely. I do however struggle with various family members sharing so much of their children’s lives on social media. It feels like an invasion of the child’s privacy, especially when settings are not private. I sometimes long for the days of the landline being the only form of communication. Most days I feel like a slave to my phone!
Thank you for sharing your experience lovely :)
I so miss landlines.
Hello Molly, I don't have social media by choice. Never had Instagram or tiktok. It is true that you are not constantly bombed with everything, if I am interested in something I go and search on the internet but it doesn't overwhelm me or lead me to think that I am missing out on something. I live the life I want to live and I am happy with that! 🌈 I read a lot of books too because I use my time for that or stay out with my son and my partner or family. The world needs more real life and genuine relationships 💞
Thank you for sharing Molly, have a lovely week 🪻
Thank you Lara! :)
I dislike social media platforms and removed them from my phone. The only online platform I'm building is LinkedIn and it's stressfull enough. I take weekends off.
I wish one day, I was brave enough to quit them all. :)
Thank you for being so honest Molly! It's so refreshing to see people's accounts of what their life is like outside of social media – I think for so many of us it feels like a difficult step to take. I've massively reduced my social media over the past few years and I hope that, soon, I will be off it entirely 😊 I hope more people follow suit!
Thank you Leah!
I love all of this utterly.
I use Youtube and Substack and very limited use of Instagram and WhatsApp (to send occasional photos).
Two friends recently said of me (independently) that I only text them to arrange a meet-up and I never message in between. I was startled by this - is this what people do? Apparently lots of people message loads between meeting up with friends. I was floored by this as it never occurred to me to do so 😆 I clearly had never seen the point!
These two friends both said that it was actually really nice because when they see me there's lots to talk about and catch-up on and one even said it makes her feel like her life is interesting because she has lots to say.
My parents also don't have the Internet in their house, my Dad keeps his MOBILE phone in a cupboard and checks it a few times a week and my OH has no social media accounts whatsoever. I think I have it easier in terms of not using it much because of these things. I'm also 44 and lived half my life without even using the Internet let alone a smart phone.
I understand that limited or no use is not for everyone as there are people in situations where social media is an absolute lifeline and it wouldn't be appropriate for them to stop using it, or even to limit their use, BUT this isn't my situation, nor that of anyone in my immediate circle, so I'll probably just carry on as I am...!
Thanks so much for this post, it's one to save and re-read.
Thank you so much for sharing Mel! I'm the same, I never really enjoyed messaging and only use it for logistics!
Thanks for sharing - these points are definately food for thought. I only really look at instagram - and that's for interiors/floral ideas - but being honest have definately also been influenced to spend more because of the ads and promotions that come up. I like your idea of only tackling msgs between set times. I think I'll apply that to my instagram checking! In complete agreement re tik tok/shorts etc being grating. Unbelievably - to me a least - I was in the waiting room last week for a hospital appt and the guy two chairs away started playing a tik tok video, on loud. I get sensory overloaded by that kind of noise and after feeling like someone was grating my brain for 5 minutes I thought "no, it's not ok. I'm going to politely say something" and I did. I explained that I have problems with my ears and that's part of why I was at the hospital so would he mind using earphones? He took it ok (could have been touch and go!) but also a little like a nine year old being put in line :)) Maybe that explains why it happened too... I normally wouldn't be so bold, but I just felt so strongly about the thoughtlessness. I've seen people do this in restaurants too - flood the room with their video noise. I'm hoping that feedback/requests to turn loud videos off in public will help a few other souls with their sanity too. It could be wishful thinking!
Thank you for sharing Kate and good for you for speaking up! :)
Oh wow, this sang to my heart so much. I am so happy for you, for how you have been feeling since you left social media.
As one of the comments on here says, 'this is the most convincing leave social media piece I have read'. It was the push I needed to delete the IG app from my phone (for the rest of March, to start with, and then let's see where it goes...).
I noticed myself recently drifting away from some of my core principles (mostly a more minimal, more sustainable way of living), and I am sure that social media and pressure from the outside world had something to do with this. It's strange, because often these things can also help me to stay true to my values - but not at the moment.
Wishing you all the best from my newly (mostly!) social media free world :)
Ah amazing, god for your Holly! I think trialling life without SM is a really good first step :)
Do you know, I’ve barely missed it this first day without it 🥰
Amen to this Molly :) I left social media about 7 years ago. I also took the independent publishing house I run off all social media at the same time and lots of people told me it was business suicide. It absolutely wasn't -- it's our 20th anniversary next year and the books sing their way into the world without vaccuus 'likes' that don't translate into anything 'social' or connected in real life. Your post is beautiful and it is heart-breaking for all those who feel they 'have to' be on platforms that just eat them up.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience Jan and congrats on your 20th anniversary! :)
“I don’t know what an old colleague had for breakfast.”
This sounds like such a small thing, but it’s so huge to me. Mostly because it doesn’t stop with that one person- now I know what 10 people had to breakfast, 3 brunch photos, a dozen people at lunch… and this is just FOOD!
Then it’s everyone’s 500 word opinion piece of airline safety or the royal family, or…
Just too much. I don’t need all that input. Deleted my Twitter last summer. Deleted IG earlier this year. Only have FB for client work. Haven’t deleted LinkedIn yet, but soon.
Thanks for this great piece.
I find myself very often thinking how great will feel not having social media. I also find myself in the reality of leaving abroad and social media helps me have a glimpse of friends and family at home, or how important social media become to search for jobs, events, conferences, etc.
I don't know if I am ready to give up completely but I really consider the option to reduce my use to the minimum.
One of the things I enjoy the most now that I making an Instagram fasting is to consously enjoy places and situations that in a different time I would have been with the phone in my hand.
I loved reading your experience. Definitely something I want for myself at some point.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts lovely :)